Wednesday, November 21, 2012
My next move...
This year is going by so ridiculously fast. I'll be graduating in just over a year. I have no idea what I'm going to do next. Ashley really wants me to move to Flagstaff, AZ and move in with her. I'm considering it. I mean, there won't be anything left for me in Chico and I don't want to move back in with my parents long term. I have to see where life takes me but it's an option I'm seriously considering. I think it'd be good for me. I really miss Ashley and it'd be good for us to have some real time together. I have a lot of thinking to do.
Tuesday, November 20, 2012
My AHO story
I never posted about this but over the summer, I was diagnosed with Albright's Hereditary Osteodystraphy. It's a syndrome in which my DNA had a mutation
and my body doesn't recognize the parathyroid hormone which has caused all sorts
of problems.
So, I went back to Stanford to see Genetics again and the Endocrinologist today. The Endo. was normal, I guess. We went over my symptoms which took forever and they took blood. They said they'd send the results in 7-10 business days and we'll go from there. The geneticist was not so great though. They told me that my AHO is mild and it won't get any worse which is great. It could be a lot worse but there's nothing we can do to prevent the calcium deposits from growing. My calcium levels are normal and it's just a result of my body's inability to recognize the parathyroid hormone. We were trying to get some more information out of them but there was nothing for them to give me because the disorder is so rare. The only recommendation they did have is that I have yearly blood draws to check my levels which may help.
So, I still feel a little lost still but I guess I'll just go on living life until another calcium deposit grows too big to tolerate and then deal with that when it happens. That's all I can do. I am glad that I don't have to go back anymore though, at least for Genetics and I have a diagnosis which was the goal in the first place
So, I went back to Stanford to see Genetics again and the Endocrinologist today. The Endo. was normal, I guess. We went over my symptoms which took forever and they took blood. They said they'd send the results in 7-10 business days and we'll go from there. The geneticist was not so great though. They told me that my AHO is mild and it won't get any worse which is great. It could be a lot worse but there's nothing we can do to prevent the calcium deposits from growing. My calcium levels are normal and it's just a result of my body's inability to recognize the parathyroid hormone. We were trying to get some more information out of them but there was nothing for them to give me because the disorder is so rare. The only recommendation they did have is that I have yearly blood draws to check my levels which may help.
So, I still feel a little lost still but I guess I'll just go on living life until another calcium deposit grows too big to tolerate and then deal with that when it happens. That's all I can do. I am glad that I don't have to go back anymore though, at least for Genetics and I have a diagnosis which was the goal in the first place
Sunday, November 18, 2012
5 weeks and 5 days later...
OK. I need to hit pause and rewind right now because I can not believe it hasn't even been six weeks since I lost my job.
I feel like I've been on an emotional roller coaster.That week that I lost my job was horrible. I grieved pretty badly but my friends were there to pick me back up.
I haven't been doing so well lately, especially the past couple weeks but without going into the graphic details I'll just say that I'm doing Ok now. My family and friends have been so supportive. I'm starting to think clearly which is nice.
What I need to do is figure out what the hell I'm doing with my life. I know, for sure, that I'm not going to join the military. I feel like my life is leading me down a different path. I'm not sure where that path goes but I'll figure it out. I'm going to start weighing out my options.
Right now, my best options are:
1) Graduate and move back home to Paso.
2) Move to Flagstaff, AZ after graduation and live with Ashley.
3) Move down to Fullerton if I get into Graduate School and go to CSU, Fullerton.
4) Move back east (fat chance)
Those are my best options right now but I only just started thinking about it. We'll see where life takes me.
I feel like I've been on an emotional roller coaster.That week that I lost my job was horrible. I grieved pretty badly but my friends were there to pick me back up.
I haven't been doing so well lately, especially the past couple weeks but without going into the graphic details I'll just say that I'm doing Ok now. My family and friends have been so supportive. I'm starting to think clearly which is nice.
What I need to do is figure out what the hell I'm doing with my life. I know, for sure, that I'm not going to join the military. I feel like my life is leading me down a different path. I'm not sure where that path goes but I'll figure it out. I'm going to start weighing out my options.
Right now, my best options are:
1) Graduate and move back home to Paso.
2) Move to Flagstaff, AZ after graduation and live with Ashley.
3) Move down to Fullerton if I get into Graduate School and go to CSU, Fullerton.
4) Move back east (fat chance)
Those are my best options right now but I only just started thinking about it. We'll see where life takes me.
Wednesday, October 10, 2012
Getting fired is never fun.
I lost my job yesterday. I can not tell you how hurt I was by this. I felt/feel betrayed. I was a loyal employee. I worked hard, was rarely late, and did my job well. They claimed that there were "performance and scheduling issues". I was so pissed off by this.
For one, I do not have performance issues. Even my co-workers thought I was a great employee. They've told me. They're all shocked by this.
Secondly, scheduling issues is a bullshit excuse. I get out of school every night at 4:45. The evening shifts don't start til 5:15 or 6. I could easily work those but I was only getting 1-2 ever since school started. If they don't want to work with students, then they shouldn't hire them.
I don't think it's fair at all. I heard they fired others but I'm not sure. I didn't do anything to deserve this and they never even spoke to me. I've never been written up or anything. It's not right but it is what it is and I'm moving on. I'm just really hurt that they would do this to me.
The worst part is that they said that I'm not a "good match". That's such bullshit. I've worked there for over a year and I'm not a good match?! Yeah. I'm so sure.
For one, I do not have performance issues. Even my co-workers thought I was a great employee. They've told me. They're all shocked by this.
Secondly, scheduling issues is a bullshit excuse. I get out of school every night at 4:45. The evening shifts don't start til 5:15 or 6. I could easily work those but I was only getting 1-2 ever since school started. If they don't want to work with students, then they shouldn't hire them.
I don't think it's fair at all. I heard they fired others but I'm not sure. I didn't do anything to deserve this and they never even spoke to me. I've never been written up or anything. It's not right but it is what it is and I'm moving on. I'm just really hurt that they would do this to me.
The worst part is that they said that I'm not a "good match". That's such bullshit. I've worked there for over a year and I'm not a good match?! Yeah. I'm so sure.
Monday, October 8, 2012
Officially a Big Sister!
That's right. I'm a Big sister now! I'm so excited.....it's not what you think though.
It's my Alpha Chi little sister, a pledge who will be a new active shortly. I'm so happy that we were paired up. I was second on her list and I was glad to pick her as my little. It's a glorious day in the Charmers family! :)
It's my Alpha Chi little sister, a pledge who will be a new active shortly. I'm so happy that we were paired up. I was second on her list and I was glad to pick her as my little. It's a glorious day in the Charmers family! :)
My plans....
The past few months, I have been thinking really hard about what I'm going to do with my life. I want to join the Air Force but that's not set in stone so I had to come up with alternatives that would make me happy. At first, I didn't think I would be ok doing anything else but with the help of loved ones, I came up with some pretty epic plans. See below...
Plan numero uno
Plan numero uno
- Join Air Force
- Move back to paso for a semester til I can get an apt. with Ashley down in Socal
- Apply to the Masters program
- take a year off while working at Chipotle
- Have Ashley move to Socal the semester before me and then move in with her immediately after graduation.
- Apply to the Masters program
- take a year off while working at Chipotle
- Move back to Paso indefinitely
- Get a job as a substitute teacher
- Apply for the Masters program
- Work at Chipotle
- Live at parents until I find my own place
Thursday, October 4, 2012
Living in the now
I've always been the kind of person who focuses on the past, past regrets, memories, things I could have done better. It's time for a chance. It's hindering me. I can't let go of my ex fiance and it's hurting me so much. I've been able to forgive myself for the most part over how I went about things in that relationship. I still care for him a lot but we will never be. He doesn't want me and that's fine.
What matters is that I have grown. I have changed. He doesn't have to accept it or maybe he has and still doesn't want me. Maybe we're just not meant to be. That's fine. That just means there's someone better out there for me.
I'm going to focus on the one thing I do have the ability to change and that's my weight. I'm going to start working out more, especially now that my doctor gave me the green light to start running. I want to start running everyday or at least every other day. I also want to start eating healthier and eating smaller meals. I want to lose 15-20 lbs. I want to be 105 lbs. I'm 124 right now and I don't feel healthy. I feel beautiful but I don't feel healthy. I want to feel healthy.
This starts.....NOW.
What matters is that I have grown. I have changed. He doesn't have to accept it or maybe he has and still doesn't want me. Maybe we're just not meant to be. That's fine. That just means there's someone better out there for me.
I'm going to focus on the one thing I do have the ability to change and that's my weight. I'm going to start working out more, especially now that my doctor gave me the green light to start running. I want to start running everyday or at least every other day. I also want to start eating healthier and eating smaller meals. I want to lose 15-20 lbs. I want to be 105 lbs. I'm 124 right now and I don't feel healthy. I feel beautiful but I don't feel healthy. I want to feel healthy.
This starts.....NOW.
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